Sunday, 31 July 2011

Friday, 29 July 2011


I am now wring a notebook of lies, I keep telling myself that my father is out there. When just possibly, he may not, will I stop looking?

I have given up on my search, these voices, these shadows are too much.
I'm sorry my father, I am weak. I am so sorry for wasting your time, please don't bother to read this anymore I am done. I am completely fed up and I'm going to seek medical help now possibly contact the authorities, they could find my father better then I could.



Sunday, 24 July 2011

bloody hell.

do NOT mix drinks I woke up with the biggest hangover ever. I walked outside for some fresh air and saw a guy standing outside holding a bottle of water he looked towards me and smirked. "Looks like you made it to hell and back" "shut up" I muttered.

Usually I am not a bitter person today I felt horrable for doing such a thing but by the time I look back he was gone. What a strange man.

I should be good by this evening.

Thursday, 21 July 2011


Sorry not sure where that last post may have come from. Strange I don't remember writing it. I'm headed into California right now, I'll talk to you once I get into a hotel.

Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Escape from the trees.
this is not a warning.
This is an announcement
Listen to the voice of the spirits
They may lead you to safety.
May they lead you to safety.
Alice is watching me.
She is watching us.
Not from the looking glass.
And she knows

Thursday, 14 July 2011

Zero X?

I was asleep against a fairly large tree, until a series of cracking woke me up. When I was half awake another crack, followed by another, and another. A small creature possibly? Another series of cracks and movements sent me to my feet and towards the bush with my flashlight.


A small voice giggled. 

"Hey who's out there?" A small child walked out she looked no older then eleven, she shone her own light in my face blinding me for a moment.

"Hello, Have you seen buck?" she asked steering her light towards the ground where dog paw prints were firmly imprinted into the earth, they looked a few hours old.

I rubbed my eyes and looked around. 

"No I'm sorry I have not, what are you doing out so late?"

"Looking for buck" the girl said calling out her dog's name.

"Where are your parents?" I asked, examining the girl with my flashlight. A large white jacket, sandals, Red skirt and her hair was long and black.

"At home, sleeping I guess" she sounded unsure of what she was saying, possibly lying for she looked like she had been out for a while and I do not mean a few hours I mean a few days.

"Are you lost?" I asked she looked away and nodded.

"I swear I just came in here to look for buck, but it started to get dark, and everything looked the same, so i started running because there are bears and wolves and wild animals in the woods..." The girl fell to her knees in tears her flashlight beside her.

"Hey, hey c'mon now it's ok..." i said trying to comfort her as much as I could.

"Could you take me home?" she asked.

I couldnt say no, my makeshift tent had only enough room for me, but if i said yes I risk losing my current location. It really was a hard choice but I ended up saying yes and walking her out of the woods.

We reached her house, all lights on, two  silhouette frantically running around behind closed curtains, cries and telephones ringing. I knocked at the door.

A mother, mid-thirties answered, her hair was a mess, she looked so concerned and frustrated with a baby in her left arm and a telephone against her ear and shoulder, the baby reached up crying.

"Emily!!" the mother said dropping the phone. An older man ran up, his grey hairs shone through the black ones and he leaned down giving his daughter a hug and lifting her up. Her mother started crying and thanked me over and over. Just as I was leaving I heard the girl speak. 

"Hey Vivian... she said from the stairs I turned around and she raised her hand signing out something.



The door slammed shut before she finished what a way to leave people hanging. I never brought my flashlight for whatever reason and had to find my way back in the dark. Emily wasnt kidding when she said the dark was scary and I begin to hear the voices again.


And so I did, blindly through the woods, until I fell upon my camp site. It was destroyed, my makeshift tent was ripped down, my water jug and supply of food was also gone and my book was open some pages ripped out. I picked up the still lit flashlight and shone it at the book and in it was a zero with an X through it and the word WATCHING written in blood.

Saturday, 9 July 2011

the veil of death

I have been ripping out pages and cutting out pictures and throwing them all away.
Damn this book, may it burn in hell, it was fun to read and fun to look at, but now I feel addicted.
This figure of a tall man, the man who watches with no face, he can see with no eyes, hear with no ears, smile with no mouth. What a horribly sicking idea.

its creepy, its terrifying, and I'm begging to get some  understanding on why everyone died or ran away, this only makes me want to find my dad more so I can question him. Before sleeping at night (under a self-constructed roof made of branches) I hear whispers, voices, screams.

Yet no one else is around, voices of an unknown origin that mutter some things to me.
'Sleep. Dont sleep. Sunlight. Darkness. Sky. Look around...DON'T LOOK"
I cant tell if Im dreaming anymore, everything is blurring together I have not slept for a bit, I'm getting sleep tonight even if I have to knock myself out.
And for now I rip another picture with words on top:
mekei ru'inka,
komi da'roe

Translation (my translation is rough):
forever sleeping,
the veil of death

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

An Introduction

An Introduction?
I guess you can call me by my birth name, Vivian.
I am nineteen years of age.
I have hazel eyes and dirty blond hair.

I'm not good with these types of things; I was born and raised in a small country home with my mother (Mary) and father (Jay). Both loved me very much and I worked very hard with all the animals: The two dogs, four cows, six sheep, four chickens, one cat and a small pond of fish. (Although these weren’t actually 'ours' I fed them until winter when I would go fishing for a few to keep for dinners in the future, and because I was the only one who took care of them I called them ours).
I've always been a traveler child, which basically means I was always wandering off from our home into the city (which was two hours away by truck) I didn't even know how I lost track of my location.

My mother died when I was fifteen, it was a sudden death that shocked us all. Naturally I was saddened and wandered even further this time into the woods and open fields of tall grass for days before someone found me and brought me back home.

When I was nineteen my father gave me a very old book, the pages were very delicate and could easily tear, all the entries were done in a special ink and there were very artistic hand done drawings of children and sky's and nature.
It was a beautiful gift; the book's cover was a golden color.
I never did open it, until a week ago, I decided to share it will you all of you.
But mainly for my father’s sake, I was hoping answers would lie in the pages.

Maybe some of you can make sense of this 'faceless man' or the 'the masked men'?
Because I myself do not understand, maybe it’s a spirit that haunted the clan or people who played bad tricks to scare the clan out of their land.

I'm wandering only this time I have a purpose, my father is the only reason I keep walking. He may know the answers. He may be in hiding from the men like the ones in the book, the ones with the wooden masks. I hope I can find him and so I will keep walking until I do.

Like Seik'nia, who kept searching for an exit from the wood's I will search for an exit from this loneliness

Saturday, 2 July 2011

Curse of this book?

And all things shall be found out.

I assume over time everything will be played out like a beautiful plan and we will hit ourselves for not seeing it sooner.

I bet you its right in front of us, I bet you everything is already there but we are to blind it see it.
I'm starting to wonder if there is a pattern to this books owners.

My great great grandfather gave it to my great grandfather, three months later he committed suicide and the details of it was written in blood.
He died a bloody death.

My great grandfather gave it to my grandfather and three weeks later he died, a page was blank for he died in his sleep.

My grandfather gave the book to my father and three days later he and my grandmother died in a house fire a page was burnt in the center leaving a hole.

My father gave it to me, I was so far the only female child to receive this book because my parents never had a male child, and three hours later he is missing.

A page is torn from the book; I have yet to find the page I fear I may have lost it.
I am scared more to what may have been on it maybe answers or a clue; thinking about it annoys me for it is my fault the page is gone.

Each owner that handed it down is either dead or missing.

This old building is very lonely as well, thats what the old dirty picture frames and broken rocking chair tell me, a beautiful house though I must say.
 The family must have been such lovely people, the smiles and warmth from this old house comforts me in a new way that I have never felt myself.

Dad if only you could feel this warmth, where are you?

I will just wrap myself up in the best jacket I have and type this out, the man across the street has free internet access, and its crappy but good enough for me to post this.

I look forward to tomorrows sun; it's warmth on my face.
That is what I am looking forward to, and maybe I will find my father too and then we can travel to find the land that is holy together.

Father would you like that? I miss your laugh and smile I'm sure mother does too if you see mother say hello for me.
If you can hear my voice please tell her that.
I must get some sleep before daylight comes, post more soon I hope.

Friday, 1 July 2011

Holy land.

From what this book tells me the land owned by the Tinki'na people was considered holy.
The land was holy because of many old rituals and cleansing magic they did and so the land was cleansed of any darkness.

Because the land was untouched of darkness the faceless man could only watch from afar and he could not enter the land or touch the people.
When the child named Seik'nia entered she may have weakened the land and as she grew she may have slowly deteriorate the blessings.

Because of this, with time, the mask men were able to break through and kill the people.

I believe that is why Seik'nia felt she had to return to the land and make a final blessing that used her life.
Maybe this one spot of land is still holy and if that is true then it is this one spot that the faceless man cannot enter.
Or possibly, just maybe, it might cripple him if he was to enter it. 

From what I also read it was only her body was used to seal the wind, earth and sky spirits into the land and keep it holy.
That may mean her own spirit could be wandering the land somewhere, it could be possible that she is still protecting the land from the faceless man.
Maybe she was reborn.

Too much thinking Vivian.
Time for bed.